Trainer Honesty

Honesty sounds simple enough, right? Say what you mean, mean what you say. Easy. Except… it’s not. In real life, honesty lives in that awkward grey space between what you feel, how you say it, and how it lands with someone else.

And nowhere does that get more “awks” (thank you to my kids for that one) than in a gym.

Because the gym isn’t just a place for squats and sweat. It’s a space where people show up vulnerable. You’re tired, you’re pushing limits, sometimes you’re doubting yourself. Add another human into that mix, a trainer or a training partner, and suddenly honesty feels a lot more confronting.

This morning, I had one of those moments.

I asked a client if she’d be happy to share her session with someone else. She said yes, no hesitation. All smooth on the surface. But later, she admitted that internally it was more like, “Umm… not sure about this.”

And honestly? That kind of honesty, after the fact, is gold.

Because what she shared wasn’t about disliking the other person or being difficult. It was about knowing herself. She feels more comfortable training solo. That’s it. Simple. Valid. Important.

Now here’s the flip side.

“My esteemed readers “(a phrase I’ll happily borrow from Bridgerton), my job as your trainer is to be honest with you

I’m here to help you build muscle, improve mobility, and strengthen your bones. That means I’m paying attention to everything. The subtle shifts, the sneaky shortcuts, the moment your brain says “I’m done” but your body still has a rep or two left.

So when you tell me you can’t do another rep, and I know you’ve got more in the tank, I’m going to push you.

When you ask to load up an extra 5kg on the trapbar, but your shoulders are rounding halfway through the lift, I’m going to say no.

Not to be difficult. Not to hold you back. But because form before load always wins. Because progress without integrity is just an injury waiting to happen.

That’s my version of honesty.

And here’s the thing. Both types matter.

Your honesty helps me coach you better. My honesty helps you move better.

So don’t wait until after the session. Don’t sit on that “this feels off” or “I’d rather do this differently.” Whether it’s before, during, or after, say it. If something feels manky (another technical term) speak up. And if there’s a good reason I’m getting you do do a particular movement, I’ll explain it to you. 

Because honesty in the gym isn’t just about truth. It’s about trust.

And that’s where real strength is built.